I overheard that they're trying to find experts to study the latest outbreak of assfaceitis. It appears to be prevalent in republican circles. It is believed to be spread through having one's lips in contact with trump's ass for extended periods over many days. There has been a less virulent strain noticed in some democrats.
And to be "pellucidly clear" (i learned that redundancy from Andrew Torrez), i mean every iteration of his face, not just the one used today. New, stock, whatever.
I have a yuuuge favor to ask, in absolute sincerity:
If you hafta put that fucking nightmare of a mug front and center in the top/tile/thumbnail pic, such that every time we share such a piece here or elsewhere, we're reproducing that fucking nightmare of a mug...
PLEASE JUST TURN IT UPSIDE DOWN.
like, every fucking time from here on out. Pretty please, gorgeous please, irresistible please?
E.g. the "HIRING" image should stay properly right-side-up and legible, but please please PLEASE, PLEASE I'M VERY MUCH BEGGING YOU, do a 180° rotation of that FUCKING face from now on.
He already doesn't deserve any of the oxygen surrounding him; even less so a faithfully transmitted image of his unforgettably smug gob.
I get it. I hear you. But I don't think I'll be able to help you out here. That said, I am definitely invested in not saturating TFN with that face, regardless of the iteration thereof. You may have noticed, for instance, that in recent posts I used thumbnail pictures of totally unknown judges, which REDUCES how often people will click on it but, I hope, helps dilute the overwhelmingness of imagery. I'm well aware that our media favor "heroic" and "impressive" imagery and try to be very conscious about merely amplifying ... UNLESS I can subvert it, as was my intention here. So I hope you'll still see me as being on the same side re this issue, even if we may differ on some of the tactics...!
😭 but Fair enough! I know fuckall about how to journalismize, publicize, etc. Your tiny share of this reluctant capitalist's income is still money well-squeezed!
“It wasn’t immediately clear which ethnicity Elez claims, but his online profiles suggest that he’s descended from Douchebag-American stock.” That’s the only group the Trump administration does endorse for DEI.
This article is gold.
I’ve seldom laughed so hard at bad/good? news.
I overheard that they're trying to find experts to study the latest outbreak of assfaceitis. It appears to be prevalent in republican circles. It is believed to be spread through having one's lips in contact with trump's ass for extended periods over many days. There has been a less virulent strain noticed in some democrats.
And to be "pellucidly clear" (i learned that redundancy from Andrew Torrez), i mean every iteration of his face, not just the one used today. New, stock, whatever.
I have a yuuuge favor to ask, in absolute sincerity:
If you hafta put that fucking nightmare of a mug front and center in the top/tile/thumbnail pic, such that every time we share such a piece here or elsewhere, we're reproducing that fucking nightmare of a mug...
PLEASE JUST TURN IT UPSIDE DOWN.
like, every fucking time from here on out. Pretty please, gorgeous please, irresistible please?
E.g. the "HIRING" image should stay properly right-side-up and legible, but please please PLEASE, PLEASE I'M VERY MUCH BEGGING YOU, do a 180° rotation of that FUCKING face from now on.
He already doesn't deserve any of the oxygen surrounding him; even less so a faithfully transmitted image of his unforgettably smug gob.
This might help. The link is for a Chrome app, but I looked for the same thing on Firefox and it was there. It works. It's the MAKA app, or Make America Kittens Again. https://chromewebstore.google.com/detail/make-america-kittens-agai/klchnmggepghlcolikgaekpibclpmgcm?pli=1
YOU ARE MY FAVORITE PERSON TODAY.
(My wife will probably get over it by tomorrow — in fact, when I pass your glorious suggestion on to her, I fully expect she'll share the sentiment!)
I get it. I hear you. But I don't think I'll be able to help you out here. That said, I am definitely invested in not saturating TFN with that face, regardless of the iteration thereof. You may have noticed, for instance, that in recent posts I used thumbnail pictures of totally unknown judges, which REDUCES how often people will click on it but, I hope, helps dilute the overwhelmingness of imagery. I'm well aware that our media favor "heroic" and "impressive" imagery and try to be very conscious about merely amplifying ... UNLESS I can subvert it, as was my intention here. So I hope you'll still see me as being on the same side re this issue, even if we may differ on some of the tactics...!
😭 but Fair enough! I know fuckall about how to journalismize, publicize, etc. Your tiny share of this reluctant capitalist's income is still money well-squeezed!
Well, you shoulda told me you're a paid subscriber! Paid subscribers obviously get to sign off on all thumbnails. (They do not.)
Wait, does Substack not even visually tag Paidz, for your inform/edific-ation at the very least? That seems like a QoL fail on their part
Real Keystone Kops kind of handling you got there, Donald & Elon.
😂Laughing so hard, truth and absurdity side by side.
I can just picture MAGA reading this and being like yeah yeah ….wait… what?😂
“It wasn’t immediately clear which ethnicity Elez claims, but his online profiles suggest that he’s descended from Douchebag-American stock.” That’s the only group the Trump administration does endorse for DEI.
Or DUI
Brilliant piece of writing!
One can only hope to be so lucky :D
Aw, thank you! Maybe I could get a job in the Trump administration...!
Your snarkbombs are desperately, massively required throught Comms.
THROUGHOUT!